"How was your day," Emma types.
"Same things as always. Went to class, came home. Listened to continuous complaining about work. Never got a chance to speak? You know the usual. How was yours?"
Charlie and Emma have been close online friends for a couple of years. They share dreams, goals, personal struggles, and their biggest secrets. Charlie lives in California, Emma lives in a small town in Washington. They connected quickly on an online forum about art. The two talk every day. Exchanging notes about their day or complaining about the everyday struggles of being a teenager.
"Charlie, you never have anything positive to say about your day!"
"Uh, who cares, just another day. You know my favorite part of the day is getting to talk to you. How was your day?"
Emma imagines how to best answer the question. Her day was filled with algebra, AP lang, and world history. Nothing she was interested in. The other students in her high school bored her. They never wanted to talk about art, or anything that could keep Emma's attention for longer than 5 seconds. Emma always came alive in art class. She enjoyed the topics and talking with her art teacher, Mrs. Smith. Mrs. Smith has been someone Emma can be her true self with. She has shared her innermost thoughts and secrets and never once felt judged or ridiculed for how different she was.
"I enjoyed art class but pretty much everything else was a waste of time."
"What have you been working on?"
Emma's eyes gleamed with excitement as she began to type. She loved that Charlie wanted to hear about her art, and Emma liked sharing about it.
"Currently I am working on a self portrait."
"Are you finally going to paint yourself in your true colors?"
Emma knew what Charlie was hinting at. Was Emma truly ready to come out? In Emma's very small, conservative town, everyone seemed ashamed of the community she so desperately wanted to be a part of. Emma never felt comfortable to embrace her sexuality. Knowing that every step forward she took, her peers, parents, or others in her life would knock her three steps backward. She's heard comments from her peers of "that's so gay," or "that fag better stay away from me." She's seen community members use their business signs to oppose a celebration of pride month. And what hurts the most, she has heard her parents say, "I hope none of our kids end up like that."
"Charlie, you know I can't do that here. The queer community doesn't exist in this town. I will have to stay hidden just like every other lesbian before me."
Charlie knows her life in California is vastly different from Emma's life in her rural town. Charlie has been out to her friends and family for 3 years now. She started off by telling her closest friends, and then eventually her family. Her mom and dad took the news better than she expected. Her mom asked her a million questions, wanting to know when and why this happened. Her dad was happy as long as she wasn't pregnant. Over the years, both parents have come to accept and love Charlie for who she is. Charlie knows Emma hasn't been as lucky. Emma has had to hide her true identity and has only come out to one person, Charlie. Charlie knows the pressure Emma faces and tries to be as supportive as she can be. But deep down, Charlie wants Emma to find the courage to come out so they can be together.
"I will be there for you Emma. It will all be okay."
The impact of the words fall on Emma. "It will all be okay", there's no guarantee for that. Deep down she hopes that it's true, but she just can't take the risk. Not now.
"It's not worth it. This school, this town, this family can't handle me as I am. Charlie you will just have to wait. Wait for me to graduate and be on my own. It's the only way."
Charlie knows it isn't fair to keep pushing the conversation. To have a chance with Emma, she will just have to wait.
"I will wait then."
The two girls continue messaging back and forth until finally Emma admits she is tired and wants to go to bed. They say their goodnights and know the conversation will continue tomorrow evening.
The next day, Emma walks into her visual arts class and is welcomed by her teacher.
Mrs. Smith says to Emma, "I like your painting, but it seems pretty bland. Why are you only using grey and black?
Emma looks down at the floor, trying not to make eye contact with her teacher. She eventually gets up the courage to say, "It's how I feel. I can't show my true colors. So I must stay muted."
Without thinking about her response, Mrs. Smith quickly replies with "why can't you show your real colors?"
A tear fills Emma's eye and Mrs. Smith knows she has touched a sensitive topic.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up hard emotions right now, but I need you to know you can talk to me about anything. Art Class shouldn't be a place where you have to hide. You should be able to share anything you would like. "
Emma's held in her feelings for so long that she doesn't know how to handle the emotions of finally being able to be free. She breaks down some more, tears continuously falling from her blue eyes. She wants so badly to be accepted.
"I?I?. I can't tell you," she mumbles out to her teacher.
"I would hope by now you would know you can tell me anything and I won't judge or scold you. But I am also not going to push you. Emma, I am here and ready to listen."
Emma collects herself and wipes the tears from her face. She wants to tell someone what is bothering her but doesn't know how well her teacher will handle the news. The secret has been hard for her to maintain. Charlie is someone she trusts, but anyone else may not keep her secret. She decides that Mrs.Smith is worth the risk.
After a long pause, Emma takes a deep breath, "....Mrs. Smith, I'm gay."
The news lingers in the air as the two process what has just been said. Emma feels relief as a weight has been lifted off her shoulders.
Mrs. Smith knows the tremendous decision that Emma has made. She knows she must comfort Emma and tell her everything is going to be okay. She feels pride knowing that someone trusts her so much.
She reflects on what she should say, what could possibly help Emma at this time. Floods of thoughts enter her mind, but ultimately she knows there is only one thing she can say.
Mrs. Smith swallows the large lump in her throat, makes eye contact with Emma and simply whispers, "me too."
A smile stretches across Emma's face. There's nothing in the world that has ever made her feel this happy. Finally, she's not alone.
When art class is over, Emma races to her locker to pack up her backpack. She shoves her notebooks, binder, and textbooks in her dark green bag. She makes her way out to the parking lot and walks onto her bus.
The entire bus ride she thinks about the remarkable news she was told today. She couldn't wait to tell Charlie.
Emma logs on to her macbook ready to see Charlie's typing symbol appear on the screen. As soon as it does, Emma types, "CHARLIE! I have the best news!!!"
Charlie quickly types back, "what, what!!"
Emma tells Charlie all about coming out to her art teacher. How it made her finally feel at peace.She shares that Mrs. Smith is just like her and at last she has someone to look up to.
"That's great Emma! How do you think this will impact your decision to come out?"
Emma thinks about what to tell Charlie. She wants her to know she is nervous, but still excited about what is to come. She wants to be free like Charlie and be who she is, even if it means losing people in her life.
"I think I'm ready Charlie, I want to be like you."
As she is typing, Charlie's face fills with a grin. She wants so badly to share her true feelings with Emma. To tell her, she's been waiting for this moment for so long. She wants to confess her true feelings for her. Tell her they can finally be together.
Charlie finally gathers the courage to respond, "I'm so happy for you Emma."
Emma sees that Charlie has typed several other responses but deleted them. She thinks to herself, "What is Charlie hiding? What is she not sharing with me?"
"Charlie, what are you not telling me? I see you want to say more, please just tell me."
This friendship means so much to Charlie. She doesn't want to ruin the bond they have. But she also can't continue their relationship without sharing her real feelings.
"....Emma I have to tell you something?."
Charlie continues on sharing with Emma that she has had more than friendship feelings towards Emma. She likes the way Emma makes her feel, she likes how they can talk about anything, and most importantly she likes how Emma accepts her as she is. She mentions how much she appreciates Emma and wants to be her first girlfriend. She explains that she knows they live far apart but it is worth the distance to get to be with her. Charlie has waited for the time when Emma felt comfortable to be her true self and now that the time has come she can't wait to see if Emma feels the same in return.
The news swirls around in Emma's mind. She couldn't believe what Charlie just shared with her. Deep down Emma has always shared the same feelings but never knew how to express them. She never wanted to make the first move and ruin the friendship. Emma just couldn't believe that the feeling was mutual.
Emma began to type, but none of the words seemed quite right. She wished they weren't so far apart. All she wanted to do was hug Charlie and tell her she felt the same way.
She settles with the final answer of, "Will you be my girlfriend?"
"Are you serious? Does this mean you feel the same way," Charlie excitedly types in the chat box.
"Yes, yes, I do. I would be honored to be your girlfriend."
Charlie wanted to be the one to ask, but in the end this feels right. She is elated that the two have decided to be together. She doesn't care who asked first. All that matters is that they are finally together.
The two girls talk for hours throughout the night. Each is excited to finally get to flirt the way they want. Charlie tells Emma how beautiful she is.. Emma tells Charlie that she loves her eyes and catches herself staring at her picture in the corner of the screen, longing to be kissing her sweet pink lips.
At 2 in the morning, they decide it's time to get some rest, both logging off with goodnight messages and red heart emojis.
The next day at school, A smileys stretched across Emma's face the entire day. She constantly thinks about Charlie and how lucky she is to be with her. Her life is finally going the way she wants and she can't wait to share the good news.
Emma practically runs into art class, eager to speak with Mrs. Smith.
Mrs. Smith sees Emma walk into the room and asks, "What put you in such a good mood today?"
Immediately, Emma starts telling Mrs. Smith all about the conversation she had last night with Charlie. She talks about how she has finally embraced who she is and is so happy to be with Charlie.
Mrs. Smith and Emma talk for several minutes. Going back and forth about how great things are going for Emma and how proud Mrs. Smith is of her.
Emma settles into her seat in class. She takes out the bland grey painting she had been working on the past few days. She walks towards the trash can and throws the entire thing away. Emma is pleased the painting is gone, but knows the true meaning of the act. Emma has started over. This is her new chance at a life that will make her happy.
After class is over, Emma's new painting is complete. The canvas is filled with bright colors each matching the colors of the rainbow. Mrs. Smith notices the new painting and walks over to Emma.
"I love the new painting! Most of all I love the new you."
Emma smiles brightly as she politely whispers back, "Thank you Mrs. Smith? For everything."
"Same things as always. Went to class, came home. Listened to continuous complaining about work. Never got a chance to speak? You know the usual. How was yours?"
Charlie and Emma have been close online friends for a couple of years. They share dreams, goals, personal struggles, and their biggest secrets. Charlie lives in California, Emma lives in a small town in Washington. They connected quickly on an online forum about art. The two talk every day. Exchanging notes about their day or complaining about the everyday struggles of being a teenager.
"Charlie, you never have anything positive to say about your day!"
"Uh, who cares, just another day. You know my favorite part of the day is getting to talk to you. How was your day?"
Emma imagines how to best answer the question. Her day was filled with algebra, AP lang, and world history. Nothing she was interested in. The other students in her high school bored her. They never wanted to talk about art, or anything that could keep Emma's attention for longer than 5 seconds. Emma always came alive in art class. She enjoyed the topics and talking with her art teacher, Mrs. Smith. Mrs. Smith has been someone Emma can be her true self with. She has shared her innermost thoughts and secrets and never once felt judged or ridiculed for how different she was.
"I enjoyed art class but pretty much everything else was a waste of time."
"What have you been working on?"
Emma's eyes gleamed with excitement as she began to type. She loved that Charlie wanted to hear about her art, and Emma liked sharing about it.
"Currently I am working on a self portrait."
"Are you finally going to paint yourself in your true colors?"
Emma knew what Charlie was hinting at. Was Emma truly ready to come out? In Emma's very small, conservative town, everyone seemed ashamed of the community she so desperately wanted to be a part of. Emma never felt comfortable to embrace her sexuality. Knowing that every step forward she took, her peers, parents, or others in her life would knock her three steps backward. She's heard comments from her peers of "that's so gay," or "that fag better stay away from me." She's seen community members use their business signs to oppose a celebration of pride month. And what hurts the most, she has heard her parents say, "I hope none of our kids end up like that."
"Charlie, you know I can't do that here. The queer community doesn't exist in this town. I will have to stay hidden just like every other lesbian before me."
Charlie knows her life in California is vastly different from Emma's life in her rural town. Charlie has been out to her friends and family for 3 years now. She started off by telling her closest friends, and then eventually her family. Her mom and dad took the news better than she expected. Her mom asked her a million questions, wanting to know when and why this happened. Her dad was happy as long as she wasn't pregnant. Over the years, both parents have come to accept and love Charlie for who she is. Charlie knows Emma hasn't been as lucky. Emma has had to hide her true identity and has only come out to one person, Charlie. Charlie knows the pressure Emma faces and tries to be as supportive as she can be. But deep down, Charlie wants Emma to find the courage to come out so they can be together.
"I will be there for you Emma. It will all be okay."
The impact of the words fall on Emma. "It will all be okay", there's no guarantee for that. Deep down she hopes that it's true, but she just can't take the risk. Not now.
"It's not worth it. This school, this town, this family can't handle me as I am. Charlie you will just have to wait. Wait for me to graduate and be on my own. It's the only way."
Charlie knows it isn't fair to keep pushing the conversation. To have a chance with Emma, she will just have to wait.
"I will wait then."
The two girls continue messaging back and forth until finally Emma admits she is tired and wants to go to bed. They say their goodnights and know the conversation will continue tomorrow evening.
The next day, Emma walks into her visual arts class and is welcomed by her teacher.
Mrs. Smith says to Emma, "I like your painting, but it seems pretty bland. Why are you only using grey and black?
Emma looks down at the floor, trying not to make eye contact with her teacher. She eventually gets up the courage to say, "It's how I feel. I can't show my true colors. So I must stay muted."
Without thinking about her response, Mrs. Smith quickly replies with "why can't you show your real colors?"
A tear fills Emma's eye and Mrs. Smith knows she has touched a sensitive topic.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up hard emotions right now, but I need you to know you can talk to me about anything. Art Class shouldn't be a place where you have to hide. You should be able to share anything you would like. "
Emma's held in her feelings for so long that she doesn't know how to handle the emotions of finally being able to be free. She breaks down some more, tears continuously falling from her blue eyes. She wants so badly to be accepted.
"I?I?. I can't tell you," she mumbles out to her teacher.
"I would hope by now you would know you can tell me anything and I won't judge or scold you. But I am also not going to push you. Emma, I am here and ready to listen."
Emma collects herself and wipes the tears from her face. She wants to tell someone what is bothering her but doesn't know how well her teacher will handle the news. The secret has been hard for her to maintain. Charlie is someone she trusts, but anyone else may not keep her secret. She decides that Mrs.Smith is worth the risk.
After a long pause, Emma takes a deep breath, "....Mrs. Smith, I'm gay."
The news lingers in the air as the two process what has just been said. Emma feels relief as a weight has been lifted off her shoulders.
Mrs. Smith knows the tremendous decision that Emma has made. She knows she must comfort Emma and tell her everything is going to be okay. She feels pride knowing that someone trusts her so much.
She reflects on what she should say, what could possibly help Emma at this time. Floods of thoughts enter her mind, but ultimately she knows there is only one thing she can say.
Mrs. Smith swallows the large lump in her throat, makes eye contact with Emma and simply whispers, "me too."
A smile stretches across Emma's face. There's nothing in the world that has ever made her feel this happy. Finally, she's not alone.
When art class is over, Emma races to her locker to pack up her backpack. She shoves her notebooks, binder, and textbooks in her dark green bag. She makes her way out to the parking lot and walks onto her bus.
The entire bus ride she thinks about the remarkable news she was told today. She couldn't wait to tell Charlie.
Emma logs on to her macbook ready to see Charlie's typing symbol appear on the screen. As soon as it does, Emma types, "CHARLIE! I have the best news!!!"
Charlie quickly types back, "what, what!!"
Emma tells Charlie all about coming out to her art teacher. How it made her finally feel at peace.She shares that Mrs. Smith is just like her and at last she has someone to look up to.
"That's great Emma! How do you think this will impact your decision to come out?"
Emma thinks about what to tell Charlie. She wants her to know she is nervous, but still excited about what is to come. She wants to be free like Charlie and be who she is, even if it means losing people in her life.
"I think I'm ready Charlie, I want to be like you."
As she is typing, Charlie's face fills with a grin. She wants so badly to share her true feelings with Emma. To tell her, she's been waiting for this moment for so long. She wants to confess her true feelings for her. Tell her they can finally be together.
Charlie finally gathers the courage to respond, "I'm so happy for you Emma."
Emma sees that Charlie has typed several other responses but deleted them. She thinks to herself, "What is Charlie hiding? What is she not sharing with me?"
"Charlie, what are you not telling me? I see you want to say more, please just tell me."
This friendship means so much to Charlie. She doesn't want to ruin the bond they have. But she also can't continue their relationship without sharing her real feelings.
"....Emma I have to tell you something?."
Charlie continues on sharing with Emma that she has had more than friendship feelings towards Emma. She likes the way Emma makes her feel, she likes how they can talk about anything, and most importantly she likes how Emma accepts her as she is. She mentions how much she appreciates Emma and wants to be her first girlfriend. She explains that she knows they live far apart but it is worth the distance to get to be with her. Charlie has waited for the time when Emma felt comfortable to be her true self and now that the time has come she can't wait to see if Emma feels the same in return.
The news swirls around in Emma's mind. She couldn't believe what Charlie just shared with her. Deep down Emma has always shared the same feelings but never knew how to express them. She never wanted to make the first move and ruin the friendship. Emma just couldn't believe that the feeling was mutual.
Emma began to type, but none of the words seemed quite right. She wished they weren't so far apart. All she wanted to do was hug Charlie and tell her she felt the same way.
She settles with the final answer of, "Will you be my girlfriend?"
"Are you serious? Does this mean you feel the same way," Charlie excitedly types in the chat box.
"Yes, yes, I do. I would be honored to be your girlfriend."
Charlie wanted to be the one to ask, but in the end this feels right. She is elated that the two have decided to be together. She doesn't care who asked first. All that matters is that they are finally together.
The two girls talk for hours throughout the night. Each is excited to finally get to flirt the way they want. Charlie tells Emma how beautiful she is.. Emma tells Charlie that she loves her eyes and catches herself staring at her picture in the corner of the screen, longing to be kissing her sweet pink lips.
At 2 in the morning, they decide it's time to get some rest, both logging off with goodnight messages and red heart emojis.
The next day at school, A smileys stretched across Emma's face the entire day. She constantly thinks about Charlie and how lucky she is to be with her. Her life is finally going the way she wants and she can't wait to share the good news.
Emma practically runs into art class, eager to speak with Mrs. Smith.
Mrs. Smith sees Emma walk into the room and asks, "What put you in such a good mood today?"
Immediately, Emma starts telling Mrs. Smith all about the conversation she had last night with Charlie. She talks about how she has finally embraced who she is and is so happy to be with Charlie.
Mrs. Smith and Emma talk for several minutes. Going back and forth about how great things are going for Emma and how proud Mrs. Smith is of her.
Emma settles into her seat in class. She takes out the bland grey painting she had been working on the past few days. She walks towards the trash can and throws the entire thing away. Emma is pleased the painting is gone, but knows the true meaning of the act. Emma has started over. This is her new chance at a life that will make her happy.
After class is over, Emma's new painting is complete. The canvas is filled with bright colors each matching the colors of the rainbow. Mrs. Smith notices the new painting and walks over to Emma.
"I love the new painting! Most of all I love the new you."
Emma smiles brightly as she politely whispers back, "Thank you Mrs. Smith? For everything."