The midnight prayers hit so hard that I focus on miracles, but ended up being dissapointed.i never said prayers don't work don't get me wrong, just that some happens when you aren't hopping and some prayers;you never get to see them.

I plead for good things around even as a sadist building my own castles in my own world.felt like bunches of pain was thrown at me and it's taking forever to heal; felt like life is on hold till I finish my lessons.

As I pray I feel nothing why won't doubt take the lead.feeling so down that I can't look up; I kept thinking why me? why this again? can't joy come and stay forever,

why pain being my buddy; if pain was paid for when will mine stop or is it only mine getting deeper.i hate me for adapting to things easily, hate me for thinking I'm not needed.

Don't know if I'm still fighting my own battle or taking others people's war,the zeal in me is getting fed up,yet can't give up; I need a reward for the pain. Run this clock off I'm done taking this sin called pain.kept dancing in the rain of sadness till I see showers of doubt.

I feel so loved for the first time only to know it won't last.i gave you the keys to my heart but got me searching for it on the street; was head tag "special" on me when you asked for relationship? were you blind to notice?. You throw me out to rain as I pick my feelings up the drain. I wasn't stupid to catch cold it's your breathe I just can't hold.

I blocked the amen in my pain and focus on the prayers. felt like it's taking forever to cross the sea; I love lands too:

I'm not exaggerating the pain is taking forever.i was giving authority but the power is gone. Can't make the rain stop, can't make the pain stop as I can't make my tears stop,so who I'm I to make you stop.

I count my blessings with hope there's lessons,I'm getting older and older yet I'm seeing nothing but troubles, I feel pain when I burst your bubbles.theres no secret again it's all in my face, can't run no race just my heart racing like dazzling.i love happiness,I love surprises and I will hope that till my last air,on the same spot praying here.

My efforts are nothing which got me doing nothing.I begin a trouble with my troublers just to run from frustration.I hope one day all this won't be a lesson but a story of how I tried.i feel the melody in it that I can't hear the lyrics.

Are gone opportunity still coming back,I cried as the tears keep coming. I run to a lonely place to listen to my cry alone.Felt like I had to beg to stay in the universe I was kicked out of.i wonder if anyone understand me.